Avoid Emotional Sabotage 101

decisionsEmotional sabotage is one of the things we have to consider when we are trying to overcome some of our problems.

Does it seem like there’s always something standing between you and what you want in life?

Maybe somebody else is always given the opportunities you’ve waited forever for.

Perhaps your relationships and friendships always seem to be on the outs.

There’s always the chance that you’re just very unlucky or the right opportunities haven’t come along yet.

But there’s also the possibility that there’s some type of emotional sabotage involved.

What’s even worse is that this sabotage might be coming from within or from other people in your life.

This is known as emotional sabotage.

Let’s go over the key differences regarding the types of emotional sabotage.

Emotional Sabotage from Others

In a few cases, you might find yourself on the receiving end of emotional sabotage.

This usually happens when somebody else has something that they’re looking to accomplish without making it clear to you.

To get there, they’re willing to do anything it takes to sabotage those around them.

This is what it might look like.

Let’s say you meet somebody on the internet that you’re interested in romantically.

You tell one of your closest friends about this new person, but they don’t seem to be all that supportive.

In fact, they seem to be discouraging your new relationships and attempting to convince you that this new person just isn’t right for you.

You might eventually trust your friend’s input and distance yourself from your new relationship.

What would make this an instance of “emotional sabotage” is if your friend had ulterior motives that they hadn’t made clear.

For example, your friend might have been interested in the same person and saw you as competition.

There’s also the chance that your friend doesn’t want to give up their time with you like they might if you got into a new relationship.

When another person emotionally sabotages you, they manipulate you so that they eventually get what they want.

And what seems to hurt most is that it usually comes from somebody you believe you can trust and has your best interest at heart.

Emotional Self-Sabotage

On the opposing side, there’s also emotional self-sabotage.

This would include all instances where you’re unintentionally setting yourself back and denying yourself the chance to be truly happy in life.

Here are some examples of what that might look like.

● Instigating arguments in your current relationship or friendship with a desire for the other person to “fight” for you
● Setting unspoken standards for those in your life and being disappointed when they fail to live up to them
● Not disclosing all sides of a story or argument in hopes others will agree with what you’ve said or done
● Not applying for a job or not pursuing a relationship that you don’t believe you would get in the first place

Emotional self-sabotage usually comes from a place of fear.

You might be afraid of being hurt, being rejected, or even being successful in life.

Unintentionally (and sometimes intentionally), you manipulate the situation to prove yourself “right.” Instead of being blindsided and hurt out of the blue, you can leave the situation saying, “I told you so.”

Final Thoughts

Emotional sabotage is so powerful because you might not even realize it’s happening.

You assume that your friends and family are only looking out for you.

You also might convince yourself that you’re really attempting to be successful in life.

At the end of the day, the only person that’s being hurt by emotional sabotage is you.

It’s a good idea to get rid of relationships where you feel you’re being manipulated.

You’ll also want to take a look at your own actions to see if they’re involved in your lack of success.

To your continuing success,


Rich Jablonski






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